Sunday, January 30, 2011

Reader Poll: When You're Offended

I'd like to think that I'm not easily offended, but there is one thing in particular that will get under my skin every time: when someone says, "OH, MY GOD!" It's actually even hard for me to type it, I don't even like looking at it or having it on my blog. But for the sake of the post, there it is.

It's not that I'm going to think less of someone if it slips out in excitement or frustration. What I mean more so is when someone uses it ALL THE TIME for everything.

Yesterday I was asking my sister if there were any phrases that got under her skin or offended her, and she said, "Yes. I have a student who always says, 'That's gay,' and it really irritates me."

So my question is...if you were around someone who said an offensive phrase constantly, how would you address it without sounding haughty or self-righteous? How do you handle it while, at the same time, not embarrassing them by making them feel horrible?


Nel said...

Good question. And if you get a good answer let me know, lol!
I am mostly around people that I know, and are family or super close so if I give them the look - well they know ;o)
And I tell the girls that that's not nice and tell them a better option to say....
But to someone that isn't close to me or that I am not 'raising' - I am at a lose.... really can't help you here. Sorry :o(

Anonymous said...

Mine is when people say "that's retarded" or "you are so retarded!" That grates my nerves more than any other.

And yes, when I heard someone say it, I do point out how offensive it is.

Mrs. Haid said...

I hate hearing, "That's so gay" or "That's retarded". As a teacher it is easy to correct or to say... what do you really mean by that? Because how you said it is offensive to me and many others.

I think you could mention that it bothers you a lot to her OMG. (Maybe even just saying OMG is better?? )

But...the question is can you live with the aftershocks of this? I would be irritated with anyone who corrected me for a long time. Even if they did it nicely.

But, I would still probably say something, especially if I didn't care too much about maintaining a BFF status with this person. If it bothers you that much. (I would do this with perfume or something that got on MY nerves, too.)

PS - Dan says let it slide. He is one to avoid confrontation though!

Saucy Wench said...

I handle "Oh My God" by questioning, when I can, "Oh my goodness what?" It's a passive-aggressive way of indicating displeasure with OMG while also showing interest in the situation of shock.

I agree with the others about "That's so gay" and "That's retarded". But I think my absolute least favorite phrase currently is "no homo". Boy students tend to say this after complimenting another male in some way: "I like your shirt. No homo." Because I teach high school, I can frankly handle this situation by outwardly discussing why we worry about people thinking we're gay. Gay people (male and female) don't make habits of "preying" upon people who aren't homosexuals, so heterosexuals shouldn't be so afraid. (Even if we don't agree/approve, fear is unwarranted.) Yes, there are cases where the opposite is true, but for the most part, they choose other gays just like straights choose other straights. Phrases like "that's so gay" and "no homo" are just unnecessary and rude.

Colleen said...

I also feel really strongly about taking the Lord's name in vain. I worked in a preschool once where it was so common among the employees that three year old children were walking around the classroom saying "Oh Jesus!" and "Oh my God". :(

As for dealing with it, I don't know unfortunately. I also am not sure how to do so without sounding self-righteous. I would love to know a gentle way of dealing with things like this.

I look forward to hearing the answers your other readers share.

jennyonthespot said...

Oh My God... yes. It is even hard to type. AND anything about "retarded"... "I'm so retarded", "What a retard", etc... Breaks my heart.

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