If you read this post you know that I evidently have the same taste in swimwear as 60-year-old women. And while I recognize that I am very conservative when it comes to finding the perfect suit, I've tried to find another one that appears more youthful (well...not completely youthful...I am a mom after all)!
While I've been in Michigan I've fallen in love with a store called Meijer. It is similar to Wal-Mart in that it has groceries and clothing, home wear, electronics, toys, garden/outdoor, etc. But...it's nicer! It has name-brand items for lots less (like Kohl's I suppose). Anyway, I didn't plan on looking for a swimsuit, but as I passed by my section, I found a few that I fell in love with! I usually hate how much they cost (even ON SALE the ones at Kohl's that I saw yesterday where $45). But I found a Reebok swimsuit for $25! I was so excited.
And I know that it's not a cute two-piece from Victoria Secret like my sweet, 23-year-old, youthful sister has, but it is sexy enough for this mommy!
Nothing spectacular. However, it's slimming and cute on me! :o)
I've been posting status updates on facebook from time to time about what's going on while we're in Michigan. So every now and then, someone will reply or send a message to my inbox asking, "Are you on vacation?"
My first instinct is to say no. I mean, I just traveled with Josh to keep him company, right? He didn't want to drive for eight hours on his own. I didn't want him to have to be away from home without anyone. I didn't make any plans. I don't have an itinerary for each day. Actually, I don't really even know what sorts of things there are to do or where to go.
But then I started thinking about what defines a vacation. And then I realized:
I do not have to pick up after three kids. I miss Caleb and Sarah and think about them all the time. But the fact of the matter is taking care of one out of three is practically a vacation in and of itself for me.
I do not have to make breakfast, lunch, or dinner. I am missing meals at home, but I have to admit that it's nice to not have to plan anything.
I do not have to do dishes or put them away.
I do not have to do laundry, fold clothes, or put them away.
I do not have to make three beds every day. I did put the "do not disturb" hanger thingy on the door today so that housekeeping didn't have to come into our room...so I made my own bed...it was no big deal. One instead of three is ok!
I do not have to vacuum.
I do not have to dust.
I do not have to take out the trash.
I am taking naps when Gabriel does.
So...actually...I think I'll have to start answering YES when people ask me if I'm on vacation. I can't think of a better one.
By the way. When it comes to finding something to do, we're doing just fine so far. Last night we drove to South Haven and saw Lake Michigan. It was great! Tonight we are going to a Winery, then a light dinner, then perhaps bowling or maybe swimming. Thursday there is a minor league game we will be attending, and then Friday on our way home, we will stop at the Lincoln museum and home in Illinois. :o)
I didn't want to let my fans of Measure Me Monday down and post nothing, so here is your Monday fix! Sadly, however, I have nothing to report. I am currently away from home, and I did not pack my handy dandy scale. Sorry. I did consider it, but I'm giving myself the week off from looking at "my numbers" that I see pretty much every day (yes, I know they say you shouldn't weigh on a daily basis, but I can't help it).
I packed my cereal and we bought a big package of bottled waters, so hopefully I will be ok this week.
If I could take a road trip with Josh every week, I would. I would drive for hours (well, HE would drive for hours) and all we would do is talk. We would laugh about the dumbest things. We would joke about the billboards we see. We would even laugh about the number/letter combination on exits.
That's what we just did.
Josh will be teaching a new math curriculum this fall. The textbook/curriculum headquarters (or whatever it's called) is located in Kalamazoo, Michigan, so sometime in the spring, he agreed to travel up there and learn the material. He would be the only one from his department going.
I didn't want him to go on his own. He didn't either.
So about a month ago I asked my mom to watch Caleb and Sarah. Since I'd still be nursing Gabriel, I knew I'd need to take him with us. We made the arrangements, packed up two big suitcases - one for Caleb and Sarah and one for me, Josh, and Gabriel, and were all ready for the week.
It was an eight hour trip. Gabriel did pretty good (all but one hour where he was fussy and I sat beside him in the middle of the van). We only stopped twice, and those two stops were basically back to back.
The funny parts probably don't seem as funny when they are read by someone else, but as goofy as we were being, they WERE funny. So I'll share a few of them with you.
First of all, I did not know that Illinois was full of corn. CORN...CORN...CORN! That is all I saw on Interstate 55 from the time we left Missouri until we arrived in Indiana. Not the most exciting drive! In fact, if I was judging what the population of Illinois might be by Interstate 55, I'd say it was about 10! :o) So I said something about all the corn, and Josh said...
I busted out laughing. I seriously laughed about that every time I thought about it throughout the trip.
Then eventually I saw exit 34B. Again, I laughed so hard. I was pretty slap happy by this point. I was remembering when my bra size was 34B (pre-babies). Then I joked with Josh that maybe we'd see a 44D? We never did.
Every time Josh would see another Missouri license plate, he would get all excited and give the Missouri gangsta sign (which he made up, of course) which was three fingers held to make an M. I told him he shouldn't embarrass me in front of people we'd never see again! :o)
When we got to Michigan, I said, "We are from Missouri so we are Missourians. If they are from Michigan, are the Michiganians?"
We both laughed. Josh came up with other titles, but now I can't remember! I think one of them was Michiganites.
So I'm here til Friday. Josh will be in class from 8:00 to 4:00. I have a GPS so I might venture out and see what I can find.
And then we'll have another road trip to get home. Who knows what goofy things we'll say next time.
You are an amazing mother. You found the strength and courage to home school your child when you knew it was in his best interest to be at home instead of around other children who, for whatever reason, decided to treat him poorly. You knew he wasn't going to benefit in the academic realm while being there at that time. You put aside your personal wants: time for yourself, time to be tidy, and even time with your other children and committed yourself to being his #1 fan. When your next child was old enough to start school, you wanted to remain consistent, and since you felt that God wanted you to home school your first born for another year, you taught your second born as well.
For two years you have done an amazing job. I supported your decision completely and prayed for you each day.
Now you have conveyed to me that you and your husband feel it is time to send them back to school. You know that you have instilled in them the discipline and self-worth they need to be in a school setting again. They are strong children with wonderful parents.
Please do not let anyone make you feel that this is any one's decision but YOURS. If anyone tells you that you are wrong, they are not acknowledging that the role you have as their parent is God-given, and He gives parents the discernment they need to make these decisions when we seek His guidance. Making parental decisions is one of the hardest things we will ever do, and I want you to know that I will be cheering you on in all of them no matter what. I know you will do the same for me.
Josh and I often talk about moving back to the Springfield area - specifically Bolivar, but I really like all the small towns surrounding Springfield. We have also discussed going towards St. Louis such as the Union or Washington area. I wonder if God will lead us in either of these directions some day.
But one of the things that keeps me from packing my bags right now is the fact that my parents and Josh's parents live so close. We are 30 minutes from the house I grew up in...we are 30 minutes from the house Josh grew up in. Thus, it is just a short trip for the kids to see Mama and Papa Adams or Mama and Papa Vogt. They are often willing to come play with the kids (eg: watch them for us on short notice if need be) and we often send the kids over for whatever reason (sometimes if I need a break from one or two out of three).
Such was the case yesterday. Josh helped my sister move, so I knew it would be a VERY long day (he ended up being gone from 7:30 am to 10:00 pm). Since Josh's dad was off work, we asked if he wanted a buddy for the day.
Of course he said yes.
So here are a few pictures from Caleb's day with Papa.
Caleb helped Papa in his garden and also helped sell tomatoes! I know he had a great day, and I'm guessing Papa did, too!
Is it sad that I am so over-the-top elated, thrilled, joyful [add all other adjectives that mean the same thing] about seeing this...
Yes...blacktop on our road makes me happy. Finally, after this subdivision has existed for about 10 years the city is finally making the road nice. Now my kids can ride their bikes without their tires slipping on the rocks. Now we can take walks without worrying about tripping on the holes.
It's the simple things in life that mean so much. :o)
Have you ever been humbled when you feel like life is tough and then someone says, "Yes, I've been through some tough times lately, too," and their tough times are so much bigger? A couple weeks ago, a friend of mine posted as her facebook status: "I wonder why things happen the way they do...and why..." To which one of our mutual friends from high school responded, "I ask the same question....the only answer that I have found is that God has the plan and everything happens for a reason."
The first friend was talking about her home financing situation. The second friend was talking about losing her husband a month before.
So this week, I was at a friend's house boohooing about Gabriel not sleeping through the night. Another friend of ours came by, and the subject of his sleeping patterns came up again. As I mentioned it, I saw a blank look on her face, followed by tears welling up in her eyes. She pulled herself out of it and then just nodded in agreement.
This friend had lost a 6-month-old a couple years ago.
As I drove home that night, I started to feel guilty. Why do I complain so much about Gabriel getting up a couple times at night? Why...when mothers who have lost children would gladly endure those sleepless nights again to hold their child. Why do I feel so frustrated when he only wants me to hold him? Why...when I should be thankful that I am his mother and that he wants me to comfort him.
I strive to keep things in perspective. While it saddened me to see this mother becoming teary at the mention of sleepless nights, I thanked God for reminding me that I have these sleepless nights because I have a baby who needs me. He gives me each day with him.
You missed Measure Me Monday, huh? Sorry about that!
This past week I lost...nothing. I gained...nothing. I am the same. So progress is slow, but I'm telling you, losing weight in the summer has proven to be HARD. I still resist most of the bad stuff, but I've fallen off the wagon a bit. I wake up each day and tell my self to keep trying.
I have an experienced young lad who is available for your special event. He makes a great ring bearer and has even escorted a homecoming queen candidate. He is accustomed to being in front of many people. He looks good in all colors, his auburn hair makes the perfect accent for any fashion ensemble.
As you can see, you will be highly satisfied with his appearance and performance at any event where a suit or tux is needed. He does a great job. References available upon request.
My sister and I had a very normal childhood as far as our health goes. No trips to the ER, no surgeries or procedures, no conditions that required us to see a specialist. I did break my arm once when I was 4-years-old, but other than that, we were just two healthy kids.
So I'm not familiar with the concept of taking a child to see a specialist for anything, and the thought of scheduling any type of surgery makes me feel a little uneasy no matter how basic and routine the procedure is, especially when it involves anesthesia.
Ever since Sarah was an infant, she has had excess drainage out of her right eye. And it's not just liquid, it's gross yellow mucus that builds up in the corner (yuck, yuck, yuck). I do my best to keep wiping it away, only to look at her a minute later and see it there again. Many mornings she will wake up with her eye completely sealed shut. She then will start rubbing on it which of course makes it red and irritated.
The people who are around her a lot are used to it - close friends, people at church, and family know it's just a clogged eye duct. Every now and then, though, I've had people in a store or restaurant actually ask me about it. One time we were sitting at Applebee's waiting for a table, and I could tell a young woman was a bit uneasy about it. She said, "Is she ok? Is she sick?" fearing pink eye I suppose? I just explained what it was, but I think she got up and waited outside.
Finally I asked my doctor to send Sarah to a specialist. He told me it was up to me, but I remember at one visit I just looked at him and said, "If it was your daughter, would you have the procedure?" He said he would. So in May, my mom went with me as we took Sarah to see a pediatric ophthalmologist. She was officially diagnosed with a congenital nasolacrimal duct obstruction which occurs in 6 out of 100 newborns.
After the visit with the specialist, I noticed that the drainage didn't seem to be as bad. So I then put off scheduling the surgery! But recently, her yucky eye has been over-the-top GROSS, so I finally called the surgical coordinator this morning. She said they would review her file, confirm the insurance, and give me a call with the available dates/times.
So I patiently (or not so patiently) wait for the call.
Because I posted about this on my facebook status, I found another young mom in St. James who's daughter had the exact same procedure with the exact same doctor. I literally started crying when I read her words: Awesome. [Dr. Goodrich] is who did Natalee's. He is awesome. It gave me a sense of peace to read it.
When I do find out when the procedure will be, I will be sure to post about it. I will need prayers for a calm spirit. Sarah will need prayers for a quick surgery and quick recovery.
**Surgery scheduled for Monday, August 24th. One day before her 3rd birthday.
Have you clicked on the "Pray 7x7" button over on the right? If not, I'm going to share it with you today. It comes from the first blog I ever read, and I was encouraged so much by her post that I do my best to pray for/with/over my children the way she suggests.
So here it is:
I don't really care that much about whether or not my kids are book smart.
Let me explain.
I do care, I just don't care as much as I care about other things. I don't sit around and pray that my girls will learn to read today, or that they will understand a foreign language by the time they are 6, or that they will know their times table by next week. I do spend a lot of time asking God to give them "undivided hearts (Psalm 86:11), " and praying "that they will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel when they open their mouths (Ephesians 6:19)." I pray that God will help them to be good stewards of their time, their money, their words. I pray for their character, their faith, their decisions, their husbands. I want them to be wise, Godly women who chase after the Lord.
I'm thinking that instead of getting a "My kid is on the honor roll" bumper sticker, I may create a "My kid has an undivided heart" one. And then people will make ones that say "My kid kicked your 'undivided heart' kid's butt" stickers.
But, the point is that one of the most important things I am privileged to do as a mother is to pray for my children every day.
The other day I came across a verse that God used to prompt me to write this post. If you are a mom (or have someone else you want to pray for specifically), I hope you will join me as I do this for the next 7 days. It struck me that I need reminders during the day to be praying over my girls, and I decided to choose 7 events in a day that would remind me to do so. Then, I chose verses that had to do with that time of the day (for example: as my kids are getting dressed in the morning) and then I put them on notecards.
Here are the events and verses I chose:
1. When they wake up:"Let the morning bring (child's name) word of your unfailing love, for she has put her trust in You. Show (her/him) the way (she/he) should go, for to you (he/she) lifts up her soul." (Adapted from Psalm 143:8)
2. When they are getting dressed: "Therefore, as God's chosen child, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Lord, help (him/her) bear with others and forgive whatever grievances (he/she) has against others. Help (him/her) forgive as the Lord forgave (him/her). And over all these virtues, help (him/her) put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity." (Adapted from Colossians 3:12-14)
3. While they are eating:"Teach (child's name) the secret of being content in any and every situation whether well-fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. Teach (him/her) that (he/she) can do everything through him who gives (him/her) strength." (Adapted from Philippians 4:12-13)
4. When they go out of the house: "(Name of child), do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-His good, pleasing and perfect will." (Adapted from Romans 12:2)
5. While they are taking a bath: Lord, give (name of child) clean hands and a pure heart, and let (him/her) not lift (his/her) soul to an idol or swear by what is false. Let (him/her) receive blessing from the Lord and vindication from God (his/her) Savior. Let (him/her) be part of the generation of those who seek him, who seek your face, O God of Jacob. (Adapted from Psalm 24:4-6)
6. When they are going to bed: "The Lord Your God is with you; he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, be will rejoice over you with singing." (Zephaniah 3:17)
7. While they are sleeping: "I pray that (name of child) will do everything without complaining or arguing, so that he/she may become blameless and pure, a child of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which he/she shines like a star in the universe as he/she holds out the word of life-in order that he/she may boast on the day of Christ that he/she did not run or labor for nothing." (Adapted from Philippians 2:14-16)
I feel like God has been reminding me more and more lately that I need to live my life in prayer. For my children, husband, family, friends, country, those in need, etc., etc. As a mother, it has been so pivotal for my children to hear me praying out loud over them, and I want to commit to do this every day (seven times a day!) for the next week. If you care to join me, just copy these verses onto index cards (or, if you came here from Jessica's blog, feel free to print them on pretty scrapbook paper and embellish your little heart out....:))
Let me know if you decide to join me, and please keep me posted (either by comments or emails) if God reveals anything to you/your children this week.
Have a great (and prayer-filled!) week. And may God bless you and your babies richly.
My parents have had a large garden ever since they moved out on 80 acres back in 1993. Josh's dad has had a HUGE garden ever since I've known him. You would think that Josh and I would just follow suit and be avid gardeners and capable of growing whatever our heart desired!
But that's not the case.
I never had any desire to grow anything of my own. I never really cared or understood when someone said, "There's just nothing like a home grown [insert veggie or fruit here]." I also knew that I couldn't hardly even keep an indoor plant alive for any length of time, so what would be the point of planting something outside that had to be watered daily? Who has the time or interest for that?
So when Josh's dad asked me in the spring how many tomato plants I wanted to take home, I thought I must have misunderstood the question. Surely he meant how many tomatoes did I want? I think I turned him down the first time, but then he must have called Josh and asked him! We ended up with three, and I thought for sure they would die in our garage as they waited to be planted.
But Josh was diligent (even though I was resistant) in making sure they were planted and given lots of care. He makes sure they are watered as needed. He made sure they had support posts as they began to grow tall. And today, as I was outside watching the kids play, I noticed our first red tomato...
I realize this is not a big deal to you if you have a full fledged garden, complete with green beans, lettuce, zucchini, etc. We only have three tomato plants, but it's our first attempt, and Josh did great! :o)
This week I lost my 4th of July weight (let's be honest, that entire week was shot) plus an additional 0.2 for a total of 2.8 this week. Overall, that brings me to a loss of 11 pounds.
I'm realizing that trying to lose weight and dieting in the summer is really hard for me. We're always doing something with family or friends. For example, this weekend Caleb will be a ring bearer for Josh's cousin, so we'll be gone Friday evening and Saturday in St. Louis. So unless I pack a box of Special K with me and only eat it for every meal, I'll probably pig out at the rehearsal dinner and reception because I still can't seem to keep myself in check. The Special K idea might be a good one...
And I'm wondering at what weight will anyone notice? I can't even tell. I mean, 11 pounds really isn't much when you have 40 to lose. I'm hoping maybe by 20 there will be a difference. And by 20, I'll hit two personal milestones. I've already hit one today...I am now the weight I was when I found out I was pregnant with Gabriel. So I am pre-baby weight...well, pre-third-born anyway...ha!
If you're on Facebook, you've perhaps already seen this video clip on my page. But it's just too cute not to share on my blog. I could watch it a million times. I'm not sure why, I guess it's just the excitement in her voice and I know how much fun she was having! This was early in the year, she was bowling with Josh, Josh's dad, and Caleb.
I have come to realize over the last year or two that I can no longer hide the fact that I am approaching oldness. The following habits or happenings are evidence that could be held against me.
1. I love to watch Wheel of Fortune every night at 6:30. We finish dinner and I turn on Channel 5 with excitement.
2. I usually ask Josh if he would like coffee after dinner. This is what my parents do.
3. I am THRILLED to be planning a trip to Branson (Branson? Really? Branson?) in November to spend a weekend with Josh.
4. I was telling my mom how much I like the 2009 Ford Taurus, and as we were sitting together eating breakfast at a restaurant, I saw one pull up. "Look, there it is," I said to her. And an 80-year-old man got out of it.
5. And (one of the most embarrassing moments of my life I think) when we went to Splash Zone a couple weeks ago, I looked over and noticed that a 60-year-old woman had the exact same swimming suit as I did.
Oh, for shame. It is possible that I am no longer cool.
Admit it. You watched it when it aired between 1985 and 1992. You can't help but turn it on when you see that it's on Lifetime or the Hallmark channel. You laugh when Rose tells a dumb joke, you smile when Dorothy threatens to send Ma to Shady Pines, you roll your eyes when Blanche talks about her dates.
I stayed up late watching it last night. I can't help it.
I am proud to be thrifty, frugal, tight, insert your favorite adjective here that means doesn't want to spend money when I don't have to. I love hand-me-downs for my kids, yard sale deals, clearance racks, etc.
I also love being able to use the same thing more than once for my children - since I have three, I will use the same potty chair, high chair, swings, etc. for Gabriel as I did for the other two.
And such was the case with our "My Baby Float" that we used with Caleb and then with Sarah. Here is Sarah when she was about 10-months-old:
Both Caleb and Sarah were very calm when in the water. As you can see, she just sort of sat back and took in the view! Caleb was the same. He just enjoyed the scenery and had a nice time floating around.
So when we were going to swim with Gabriel this summer, I was excited to get out this "floaty thing" and have my third child enjoy the water just like the other two. His first trip to swim was at Splash Zone in Rolla, and his second trip was on the 4th of July at my aunt's pool.
Both times, however, he would kick his feet so much and shift his weight to the front of the device that I worried that he might flip himself out of it.
In my aunt's pool, I didn't get in, but I sat on the edge and put my feet in. Josh was playing in the pool with Caleb, and Sarah sat by me (not wanting to get in for some reason). Gabriel drifted away just a bit but still in hand's reach when it happened...his body completely went forward, and his face hit the water as he was about to fall into the pool altogether. I yelled for Josh not knowing if I would be able to grab for him without falling into the pool myself (which, of course, I would have done if necessary). We took him out of that particular one!
I say all of this because I know that we - all parents - are careful. But I also know that Josh and I didn't realize Gabriel could have flipped himself out of this floaty. I'm sure that if Sarah and I went inside and it was just Josh, Caleb, and Gabriel in the pool, Josh would have thought he could turn to play with Caleb while Gabriel floated. And I'm not sure if it's because it had been used with two other kids or if my other two just didn't do the same thing, but I don't feel safe using this floaty anymore, and I wanted you to be aware of it, too.
No, not Three Dog Night from the 60's and 70's, when I refer to a three kid night, I mean a night when all three of our children woke up at some time or another, sometimes more than once.
It started with Gabriel, who wins the prize for most awake. My trips to his room were at 11:00, 12:00, 2:00, 4:00, and 6:00. Yes, as I said before, worse than a newborn. I did not nurse him, he did not seem gassy, and I really don't think his new tooth is bothering him. Perhaps this is a new thing he's trying on me. I think most of the visits to his room last night were just remedied by a binky in the mouth, but I did pick him up once (or was it twice?) to rock him back to sleep.
Sarah came into our room around 2:15 I think, right after putting Gabriel down (again). She is really easy to put back to sleep. In fact, I didn't even get up. I heard her sweet voice ask, "Mommy...can I sleep with you?" I kissed her forehead and said, "No, sweetie...go back to bed." And she did.
Caleb came in later around 4:30 or so. He seemed disorientated, so Josh asked, "Do you need to go potty?" and he did. So after that, Josh guided him back to bed, but I think he asked to sleep on the couch. So that's where he ended up.
This is the hard part about being so forthcoming about my weigh-ins. I did not lose anything this week. In fact, I gained 2.4 pounds. I knew it would be hard with two gatherings for the 4th. And I thought I would stay strong and resist all the yummy stuff (or at least limit myself), but I didn't. I had several brownies, I had more than one bowl of homemade ice cream. I indulged on some Pepsi. Oh, it was so bad.
But it's time to pick myself up and keep going. Today is a new day. I'm still going to hit my goal in November.
Yesterday at our family gathering, Gabriel decided to chew on my hand for a bit. He started on my first finger, and then I felt it...a tooth had finally arrived! I exclaimed to anyone who was in hearing distance, "Oh, my! I felt it! He has a tooth!"
I tried to get a picture today, but it didn't turn out too clear.
I'll try again tomorrow.
Evidently my friend Tina is a genius! ;o) She had commented on my "So. Very. Frustrated." blog about Gabriel getting teeth. I also learned today that just because I have three children, I am not always aware of child-development details. I mentioned to Tina this morning that Josh thought Gabriel was also gassy at night. "Well, when they're teething that can happen," she said to me. I didn't even realize that.
So here's to another milestone. I have five months left of nursing. Yep. Wish me luck on that one! :o)
The 4th of July holiday has arrived. Many will gather with friends and family. They will BBQ their favorite foods, maybe pork steaks, hamburgers, hot dogs. They will have watermelon and maybe some homemade ice cream. They will sit out on a patio or deck and watch the fireworks, perhaps having some cool lemonade. And in our family, we listen to patriotic, John Philip Sousa marches like Stars and Stripes forever!
But my mom and I have a silly tradition. Well, I don't think it's silly, but I'm sure others would. The other day she emailed me and said, "Our favorite magazine has a huge sale on Christmas cards!" We got excited because in July, at least one day (usually on the 3rd or 4th) we will listen to Christmas music!
And I love looking through that favorite magazine of ours and seeing Christmas things. I don't ever buy them, but they are cute and they remind me of the festiveness in December.
So yes, I am one of those who love the Christmas decorations at Wal-Mart in September. In fact, I think Hallmark puts up their Christmas ornaments sometime this month! :o)
Thanks, Mom, for the tradition. Josh still thinks I'm crazy, but that's ok!
I am beyond frustrated. I have a seven-month-old who has regressed in his nighttime sleeping pattern to that of a newborn. Worse actually. Ugh.
When I had Sarah and knew I would be nursing her, I had people tell me that breastfed babies were pretty much at your beck and call. They had to be fed on demand, so if they fussed, cried, acted irritable, they probably needed to eat. I was a zombie for months from sleep deprivation. It wasn't until she was almost a year that she finally stopped nursing at night. Was it her or me just refusing to do it, I'm not sure.
So I pledged to myself that with Gabriel, things would be different. I sought advice from other nursing moms who said a breastfed baby could be on a schedule. Yay! I read Baby Wise, and found it to be quite insightful. I just knew that I would be on top of things this time, and I would have this new addition sleeping through the night in no time.
And I did.
At six months, he started waking up at 2:30 am. You could set your clock by it. He would also get up at 4:30 am. I thought (and hoped) it would be short-lived, but this has been going on for over a month now with no change in sight. I tried to let him cry, but the cries turned to ear piercing screams and lasted for over 20 minutes (well, 30 actually, don't call DFS). We tried feeding him cereal before bed. We even supplemented with formula thinking maybe a full belly would help. Nope.
So, even though I don't want it to be this way, I usually end up picking him up and swaying with him for a long time. Sometimes he fights me with that, so then I let him lay with me in bed. I'm so desperate for sleep, I'm doing things I don't want to start. I've even nursed him back to sleep, even though I'm sure he's not hungry, but it works, so the zombie in me gives in. I even brought the pack-n-play into my room so I can just roll over and get him. Yep. Bad.
If you see me driving by you, you wave, and I don't wave back...or if we're in the grocery store together and I don't even look at you...please forgive me. It's quite possible that I don't see anyone around me.
I am reminded, though, that this is just a season in my life. Every night I pray that God would allow Gabriel to sleep through the night, but if it doesn't happen that way, that He would please give me strength.
And He does.
After watching Dr. Phil yesterday about a mom with the world's only deaf blind triplets, I tell myself that nothing is as hard as that! It's always good to keep things in perspective.