Have you heard this term?
If not, let me help. It's sort of self-explanatory, right? You basically put a bunch of awesome, happy pictures online coupled with awesome, happy status updates.
I've read two (maybe three?) blogs/articles about this recently. Some funny. Some down right serious. And they are basically calling out those who just go through life putting up a fake front...via facebook anyway.
I totally get what they are saying...really, I do.
But here is my problem with this concept. Who on earth thinks to take a picture (or wants to?) of what they look like first thing in the morning? Or who thinks to take a picture (or wants to?) of their child throwing a fit or being defiant or puking at 3:00 am? No pictures? How about a status update about the time I almost died when my daughter said someone was ugly. That's not how I've raised her. Why would she think that? Or say it? Why should I go to facebook and type, "My daughter really disappointed me today when she said a woman we know is ugly."
I'm not going to do that.
Having a rough day? Yeah, I have those. Lots of them. I have four kids for God's sake. And I'm married...it's not always blissful. And I have family and friends who can, at times, let me down. I'm sure I let them down, too. But do people want me to update my status every time I have a fight with my husband? Or yell at my kids when I should keep my cool?
Is there a balance when it comes to keeping it real? I'm sure there is. I mean...I guess there is. I'm not sure I've found it, though. I honestly don't think people want to hear my problems. They don't want to always know when I've been up all night with one...or two kids. When I was on the couch all night with a fussy baby only to get up at 5:30 so I could go work out...because I desperately want to lose weight, and sometimes that doesn't always go well. They don't want to know when the dog puked on the carpet right as I'm trying to leave to take a child to preschool. I don't think they want to know when I question if I'm being a good mom...or a good wife...or a good friend.
Really. Truly. I think people are ok with this...
The Chrissy who pulls herself together each day to tackle the world. Or maybe not the world. Maybe it's just tackling what the day will bring in her own little world. The Chrissy who wakes up each day with the attitude of, "This is another day He's given me. I will rejoice and be glad in it." Through all the crap...through all the joy...ALL of it is ok. Really, it is. Am I thrilled when something bad happens? No, of course not. But keeping it real might have different meanings to different people.
"My life on Facebook is an airbrushed and Instagrammed image of
my real life. I edit the suckage because I want people to think I have
my [stuff] together. I give everything a hipstacular filter to make the
drudgery look interesting. Most of the time, I think I’m a decent mom,
and I think I’m giving my kids a pretty good life. But I also think I’d
be a better mom if I stopped pretending, and making friends on Facebook
feel like they have to pretend as well." -Sarah Emily Tuttle-Singer
The thing is...I am not pretending. I do not, for one second, expect others to pretend. And I don't think they are. What you see on facebook is the real me. It really is. And if you think it's not real because I don't share the crap in my day...then I'm not sure what to tell ya! :)
But I want to know...
Do you think we're all pretending?
Dear Moms: Never Say Never
3 days ago